Yesterday, I watched a video on social media of a mom saying that what she wanted for Mother’s Day was for her family to leave the house and let her be alone for the day.
It’s hilarious because of its truth.
It’s the uncomfortable truth that time alone is what so many moms want but don’t have or don’t/can’t ask for because there’s so much shame and guilt around it.
These are thoughts like: “I don’t want to seem ungrateful.” “I feel guilty for even feeling this way.” “I don’t want my kids or partner to think I don’t love them to pieces.”
We love our children and when we are with them, we have responsibilities: the constant clean up, the meals, the need to be present emotionally, the need to answer questions (I answer half with “let’s research that”), the refereeing of the siblings, and all the other things you do as a mom that are part of your everyday.
This is part of parenting.
There is a lot of joy and gratitude in time with our kids and there is a deep need for time alone to refuel ourselves mentally and emotionally.
If you’re reading this and you’re struggling to find space and time to pour into yourself, please ask for the support you need.
Maybe you don’t need a full day; maybe it’s hours or just 30 minutes each day.
Listen to what your spirit, mind and body need in that moment. Maybe you feel the need to sit and do nothing, or read a book that you aren’t underlining and tabbing (that’s me), write in your journal about how you’re *really* doing, or listen to a guided empathy or calming meditation.
If we can find the energy and time to pour into all the other areas of our lives, we must prioritize doing the same for ourselves too. This will look different for all of us.
And you don’t have to do this alone. You can let the people closest to you be there for you. Tell them what support looks like for you.
Maybe you don’t know what all that support looks like. That’s OK. Be honest about that and then talk to someone who can help you figure that out.
Yes, you can do hard things.
Yes, you’re strong and resilient.
Yes, you’re grateful for the abundance of joy and love in your life.
And you can need and ask for support to take care of your own well-being, and still be all of those things. 🙏🏽
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